Ibiranga umukobwa uri mu rukundo rwa nyarwo, Dore ibyo akora

Mu buzima, gukunda ni ibitekerezo byishyuza bikanabuza amahoro uwabigize, kugeza igihe aboneye igisubizo umutima we. Mu rukundo abagabo baratandukanye kandi ni nako abagore batandukanye. Hari igihe ujya mu ruhundo n’umusore akagufata nk’igikoresho, akakubabaza rimwe na rimwe akamera nk’uwamuhawe ku kiguzi. Ariko ibyo ntibikura ko hari n’igihe uhura n’umusore uzi gukunda akagufata nk’umwamikazi bikakurenga, urukundo nyarwo. Hano hari ibyo wakora kugira ngo ujye mu rukundo rw’ukuri.Hinduka utangire ugaragare nk’uri mu rukundo

Umukobwa wamaze kugera mu rukundo rw’ukuri, atangira kubona ibintu mu buryo butandukanye nuko yabibonaga. Arangwa no gutangira guhora atwenga ndetse akagaragaza akanyamuneza mu maso he. Aha atangira kugaragara agura impano ziciriritse, nta handi aba azijyanye uretse umukunzi we aba yumva butakwira atamubonye. Iyo umukobwa yajyeze mu rukundo nyarwo na bajyenzi be barabibona, atangira kumva akwiye gutungurana, gusohokana n’umukunzi we kandi abasore na bo barabikunda.

Tangira uhindure imyitwarire wari uzwihoBuri wese afite uko ateye n’ibyo akunda. Gusa iyo umukobwa yakunze hari bike bihinduka. Iyo yajyiye mu rukundo biba bitandukanye.  Ushobora kuba udasanzwe ukunda kujyenda, utangira kubikunda cyane cyane bikagutera ishema iyo ujyendana n’uwo ukunda. Kabone n’ubwo waba wikundira kuba utuje, usoma ibitabo uri murugo iwanyu, iyo ukundanye n’umusore ukunda byacitse, ashobora kuguhindura nawe ugatangira gukunda ibyo umusore akunda birimo kujya mu birori, gutemberera mu misozi n’ibindi. Gusa biba byiza kuko biguha gufunguka amaso no gusobanukirwa indi si utari azi.

Tangira wige guteka kabone nubwo waba utabizi bigeragezeHari abakobwa batazi guteka, ariko niba urimo nta kidasanzwe kuko nubwo waba ubizi hari n’ibindi byinshi utazi, gusa aha biratandukanye. Niba utazi guteka ariko ukaba uri murukundo, tangira wihatire kubyiga ndetse unabikore mu gihe wajyiye gusura umukunzi wawe, bizamushimisha kurya ku biryo watetse. Kumeny ibyo umusore mukundana  akunda kurya bizagufasha kuko umusore wese akunda umuntu umwitaho, akamubera nka mama we. Ni byiza kumenya igihe aryamira amabara akunda n’imiteguro yo murugo akunda. Ibi bizatuma uba umwamikazi watsindiye umutima we.

Kwishimira no kurya ibiryo yatetseNtabwo umusore mukundana ari we uzi guteka ku isi gusa ikibanze ni uko umenya ko iyo umusore ajyiye guteka ibiribwa azi neza asangira n’umukunzi we, abitegura kandi akanabitekana urukundo rwinshi, rero ntukamuhinyuze. N’ubwo ibi biryo yatetse bitaba biryoshye nk’ibyo witekera cyangwa urya murugo iwanyu, ihangane ubirye kandi ugaragaze ko wishimye. Ibi bizereka umukunzi wawe ko hari icyo ashoboye kandi azabyishimira. Gusa uko ukora ibi niko bigaragara ko wamaze kujyera mu rukundo bya nyabyo.

Mwandikire ubutumwa kandi ntucike intege

Buri gihe ntabwo binyura umutima kuba kure y’umukunzi wawe, kubw’izo mpamvu uba ukwiye gushaka uburyo umenya amakuru y’umukunzi wawe kandi ukabiharanira. Itoze kumwandikira umubaza uko yaramutse ndetse umwifurize n’akazi keza niba agafite. Mu butumwa bwose wandika bifite umumaro ukomeye cyane kugarukamo kw’ijambo ‘Ndagukunda’ ibi bigaragariza umusore mukundana ko umufitiye ikizere kandi ko uterwa ishema na we. Uko muganira bizabafasha kwegerana mu mitima, uko niko bimera iyo uri mu rukundo rw’ukuri.

Mugaragaze mu nshuti zawe

Wenda hashobora kugira abantu bamwe na bamwe batabyakira neza, baba mu nshuti zawe cyangwa ize, gusa icyo ugomba guha agaciro nuko amateka yawe yahindutse mashya  ibyo kwita kuri ibyo uba waramaze kuyarenga. Shyiraho amafoto ye ku mbuga nkoranyambaga ukoresha nka Facebook, Whatsapp, Instagram n’izindi. Ibi bizamugaragariza ko umwitayeho, bitange igisobanuro cy’uko wahindutse ndetse ko wahinduwe na we waguhaye urukundo wifuzaga.

Tangira utekereze ku hazaza hanyu mwembiNk’umuntu wese uri mu rukundo, uba ukwiye kumva ko urukundo rwawe n’umukunzi wawe, rugomba kuzamuka rukarenga imbibe z’ako kanya ahubwo rukazabaho iteka ryose. Ntabwo ukwiye kumva ko bitazaramba, ahubwo ugomba gukora ibyatuma urukundo urimo ruramba. Nubwo mwaba mutari guteganya gukora ubukwe ako kanya, icyo ukwiye gukora ni uguhinduka, ugahiundura bimwe mu buzima ibyo kurya gutembera ndetse ukishima bihagije n’umukunzi wawe. Ibi byose bizagufasha kubaho wishimye nk’abandi bakobwa bose bishimira ubuzima bwe.

Gerageza uhange udushya mu rukundo

Urukundo ruhora ari rushya iyo ruhorana udushya. Nk’umukobwa gerageza uzane byinshi bishya umukunzi wawe atari amenyereye, nko kumutegurira zimwe mu ndyo atari asanzwe azi, kwambara imyambaro adaherutse no kumuhitiramo imyambaro igaragara neza mu gihe mwajyanye guhaha.

Kure ye utuye ntihakakubere umutwaro

Abantu benshi bagerageresha abakunzi babo kuba bava mu mujyi umwe atuyemo akajya mu wundi umukunzi we atuyemo ku mpamvu imwe gusa’urukundo’. Ibi byereka umusore ko umwitaho kandi ko kuba ari kure yawe bitaba impamvu mu bwitange bw’urukundo mukundana. Niba mutuye mu bihugu bitandukanye, gerageza utege ujye/uze kumureba kandi umwereke ko bitakugoye cyane kuko byinshi ukora aba ari we mpamvu yabyo ya mbere. N’umukunzi wawe yakora ibisa nabyo, ariko mwembi mugomba kurebera hamwe, iyo bigaragaye ko ari wowe wabona uburyo bwo kumugeraho, wibifata nk’ibyago bikugwiririye. Ibi bizakubakira urukundo rw’ukuri.

Gira inama umukunzi wawe kandi umenye gushimira

Bura nta ntungane ibaho, niyo mpamvu na we nk’umukobwa, ukwiye kumenya ko ari wowe mujyanama wa mbere umusore mukundana aba afite. Gerageza umwereke uruhande atitwayeho neza, ndetse wibuke gushima ibyiza  yakoze. Nusohokana n’umusore mukundana ibuka kumubwira ko yambaye neza niba ari ko bimeze, niba akuguriye mugasangira ibyo kurya ndetse mukananywa, uzibuke kumushimira uti”murakoze” ibi bigaragaza umukobwa warezwe neza. Nubwira umukunzi wawe aho atitwaye neza, bizamworohera kubikosora kurusha uko yabibwirwa na rubanda batari wowe.

 

T.U Nsanze

Bana natwe tugususurutse umenye

 

 




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